Family relations: my brother came to visit

My oldest brother, his wife, their youngest child and his girlfriend came from Sweden to visit us this weekend. The boys were still sick and could not enjoy the visit as much as they had wanted, however I had a great time catching up with the family. We see each other so rarely, and my brother and I are very bad at calling each other so we don’t keep in touch regularly; when we do meet, however, it’s never awkward and always very nice.

My oldest brother is 10 years older than I am, and by the time I was a teenager, he had already moved out and got married. He met his wife in high school; a beautiful girl from town (we lived outside), and they quickly got married, built a house and had children. By the time they were 25, the beautiful wife already had her own lucrative business and they were leading a well-established upper middle-class life in our home town; they still do. Their friends are their old best friends, they shop in the store we always shopped, order pizza from the same places, and go to the same bank their savings accounts were opened at when they were born. They travel and enjoy life, and now that their children are grown, they can enjoy turning 43 with all its might. They’re a very happy couple with a very stabile life; simple and good, and I envy them.

Yet, it’s the life I chose not to lead. Noo-nooo! I had to complicate my life; go off to college, study abroad, work in Europe, make friends I can’t see on a day to day basis because they live all over the world, and worst of all; marry a foreigner, an American at that! My family knows me well enough to understand my choices; I do however suspect that they sometimes think I’m quite strange. I’m the odd sister with an American philosophy professor husband who lives in Belgium.

I do love it when they come to visit though.

By Lovain

Our cultural weakness: Adam Sandler

Monday night we rented Click with Adam Sandler. The Husband & I (are embarrassed to) admit that we are big Adam Sandler fans, and will eternally forgive him for all the foul language and bad jokes he ever have and ever will produce. On Monday evening we forgave him for all the dog-humpin’, the label offences and other transgressions as we laughed out loud for an hour and a half.

By Lovain

A series of unfortunate illnesses

Every other week, all children in school are checked for lice. So far, the boys have been mercifully spared such dismay, but last Friday afternoon when I picked up the boys in school, the oldest one’s teacher came up to me and told me they had found lice in the oldest one’s hair; the very same boy who is very particular about his hair – washes and brushes it several times a week, and asks me on our way to school if it looks just right. The teacher said there were 9 children in his class alone who had been diagnosed with lice. On my way home, I picked up shampoo and a comb at the pharmacy, and as soon as we entered our home, the de-licing process began. Both boys’ hair was taken care of, and I ran 12 full washing machines that weekend, washing, freezing, evacuating and vacuuming everything possible. In the oldest one’s school-bag I found a note verifying the discovery, displaying a louse and a nit under a piece of tape attached to the note. The quest to eliminate took up most of my weekend. The Husband was bed-ridden, still suffering the remains of the stomach flu going around the week before, and I was left to battle on my own. It was arduous, however I was victorious, and I hope I never have to go through it again.

The next week commenced well, however on Wednesday the 5-year old started running a very high fever, and spent the rest of the week in a feverish state. The 3-year old went to school on Thursday, but around noon we received a call from the school, asking us to come pick him up. He had diarrhea and a fever. I spent Friday taking care of the boys; trying to get them to at least drink something, mostly to no avail. On Saturday afternoon our long awaited visitors from Sweden arrived; my oldest brother and his wife, their 17-year old son and his girlfriend, but the boys were not 100% and could not enjoy the visit as they wanted. They went to bed early while we sat up catching up, chatting; “familizing”. Sunday the boys felt better however the family had to return to Sweden in the afternoon. For comfort we took the boys to the movies to see Ben Stiller play a museum night guard, and they enjoyed it with pleasure.

First the stomach flu, then the lice and now the fever; is it over?

By Lovain

Proof of existence: the Husband's philosophical work

Today I found a document open on our kitchen computer displaying the magical words

Introduction

The purpose of this study is to show from historical and systematic grounds that teleological motives lie at the heart of Kant’s critical turn, and hence that a precise analysis of telic structures can be used to illuminate the basic strategy of the critical system’s most foundational arguments and, following upon this, the unity of Kant’s philosophy as a whole.

It really has begun. Which means it might soon be finished. Which in turn means relief, happiness and joy.

Today was a good day.

By Lovain

Our Hamster Charlie

By Lovain

My blog has a new look

I decided it was time for a change. Let me know how you like it!

By Lovain

Lovain (Executive Editor, Brussels)

I came to Belgium as a Political Science graduate student, and having studied European Studies and International Relations, I entered a career in European affairs and ended up working as a lobbyist for a large technological company for several years. When the boys arrived I quit my job, deciding that I was not able to combine a career with having babies according to my standards (see my post on having a baby in Belgium), but about a year ago the Husband’s full ride ended, and I had to start bringing home the dough again. It worked out quite well since the boys were just old enough to start school (3 years), and I found my current job very close to our home; flexible hours of my choice, international work environment, independent responsibilities along with no overtime. The transition from being a stay-at-home-mom to full-time-working-mom could not have been aided better. My work is not exactly in my line of interest but it has been interesting enough and I have learned a lot. At this point nevertheless I’m happy to take on a job that I know I will fully enjoy; my passion for writing (accompanied by my previous work-experience) will become my profession: I’m going to be an Editor!

By Lovain

I quit my current job for a better one in Brussels

End of last week I quit my current job. I have 6 weeks notice, and after that I will start working in Brussels. A large company there made me an offer I couldn’t resist. I have been pursuing this change for a few months now, but at the present that it has actually come this far, I’m nervous; not so much about starting a new job (I’m very excited about that), but about all the practical consequences. Will I never be able to take the boys to school or pick them up? Will I be even more out of shape or feel even more pressed for time? How will this change affect the boys? And my relationship with the Husband? Last year when I decided to pursue a career in Brussels, I said to the Husband with worry “but if I work in Brussels I won’t be there as much for you and the boys” whereupon he replied “that’s OK, honey, your big pay check will”.

I’m aware that millions of women feel this very same guilt and worry, but still; these are my boys we’re talking about and I want to be there for them. In the end though, I’m sure it will work out; we really don’t have a choice at this point in our lives, and realize we simply have to do the best we can with what we have. Besides, at the end of this year (when the Husband’s thesis is long gone finished) everything will be different.

By Lovain

My friend's enormous pregnant belly

I had not seen my friend the amazing M. more than briefly for a couple of weeks (exam period), and when she came over on Sunday I found myself staring into a gigantic belly. “Oh my God! Your belly is HUGE!!” I could nothing but burst out. She smiled. She’s 36 weeks pregnant and usually very slender and tall, but now she has a bulge the size of an I-don’t-know-what that pretty much takes up your entire view when you look at her. I have seen plenty of pregnant women; I myself was not exactly a petit expectant, but this is something extraordinary. If she lets me, I will take a picture next time I see her. I expect the baby to drop very soon, and even though her belly may grow a bit more, it will not look as big any more.

By Lovain

I got puked on

Following Mr. Speedo & his daughter’s barfing episode Thursday night, the youngest one & I found ourselves in the exact same situation Saturday night.

"The thing about Mexican Layered Dip is that it doesn’t look much different coming back up" I thought, as I was trying to rinse it out of my hair.

By Lovain

Kids are sick all around Leuven - it's the season!

When I dropped the boys off in school this morning, I ran into my friend Mr. Speedo.

“Where’s the youngest one?” I asked.
“She’s sick” he said, adding the nature of the illness; stomach related.
“How are you doing, Speedo?” I had not seen him for a while, and he looked tired, even a bit shaggy.
He did not answer “all right” or “tired” or “feeling yucky”, he said: “I was awake all night with princess throwing up on me. She had 4 changes of clothes and I had three”.

Now there’s proof that a picture says more than a thousand words!

Passing another friend on my way to work, she yelled across the street "one child off to school - one is home sick!"

It's that time of the year.

By Lovain

Trying to find a new job in Leuven

For the past few months, I have been looking for a new job. I enjoy my current job and it’s conveniently located 15 minutes from my house by bike, however I make very little money; not just in general, but also for what I do. Since I currently am the sole provider for my family, I need a salary that covers all our expenses, and the pay check I receive each month does not hack it. Since the company’s salary scales are rigid, I have to turn elsewhere for a raise.

I’ve found that it’s easy to find a new job, however it’s difficult to find the perfect new job. I know the amount I’d like to make, what I’d like to do, and that I’d like to work in Leuven, but so far, I’ve found no job that fulfills my 3 criteria. I have realized that to do what I would like to do, and to make the money I would like to make, I would have to start going into Brussels by train every day; consequently loosing time earmarked for my boys. Disheartening as it is, I have no choice however, and have entered the selection process for a handful positions, all currently in the last stage. On Friday I had 2 final appointments, both in Brussels, and this week, hopefully, I’ll have at least one offer.

By Lovain

My cute, adorable, sweet boy!

The other day when I picked up the boys from school, the oldest one was particularly happy, and told me “mama, I made a new friend today!” He then enthusiastically proceeded to tell me that it was a griiirl with long hair “like you mama”, and “blue eyes JUST LIKE you AND me” and “I played with her ALL DAY mama” and “she speaks ENGLISH just like you & me, mama, because she comes from where KANGAROOS live”. He was so excited about this girl - she must be new in their class, obviously from Australia - but when I asked him what her name was he thought for a while and then said he didn’t remember.

We were silent for the rest of the way, but when I pulled up the cart in front of our house he suddenly said “El-E-O-nOOre, mama, that was the griiirl’s name! El-E-O-nOOre. I remember now! Isn’t that a REALLY REALLY PRETTY name, mama?”

Isn’t the oldest one REALLY REALLY adorable?!

By Lovain

Things to do at home while recovering from pneumonia

Things I did while I was home sick:

***Watched Australian “My restaurant rules” episodes on TV, as well as any other show that happened to be on whenever I’d turn the television on (often “Oprah”, some type of home make-over show or an old episode of “Spin City”)

Why do people get so much pleasure out of watching a TV-team redo some stranger’s home? How come these shows are so popular? Really, I wonder.

***Watched the movies “Batman” with the boys, and “World Trade Center” with the Husband

Neither the Husband nor I knew exactly what this movie was about, and we were quite surprised to find Nicholas Cage stuck under a collapsed building during the majority of the movie. It was not a bad movie however there was not much to it, really. We already know exactly what happened, and we can imagine the feelings and difficulties the families of the involved heroes went through – the movie depicts this well – but well; it’s not a movie I’d want to see over and over again.

***Read “Little House on the Prairie” by Laura Ingalls Wilder out loud, mainly to the oldest one

These stories are fascinating. When I was little I watched the series on television, loved every single episode, and now that I’m older I enjoy the stories, scenery depictions and sentiment in a whole different way, still remembering the influence Ma, Pa, Mary, Laura, baby Carrie and Jack had on me as a child.

***Read “The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid” by Bill Bryson

Bill Bryson, who is recognized for his witty and entertaining travel books, is one of my favorite authors. In this book he takes the reader, not to some place, but to some time; his childhood. He gives a very vivid and exceptionally colorful image of childhood life in the Midwest in the 1950’s, and I particularly loved his portrayal of his father. Bill Bryson is a candid author, and in sharing this part of his life and memories with me - his readers, he furthered my admiration and high regard for his authorship and person.

***Read various children’s books to the boys

“Where the wild things are” is a current favorite, but they also enjoy any other children’s book we possess. Do you have a favorite you would like to recommend?

***Drank lots of tea accompanied by cough syrup

I miss the teas of Sweden. There are tea shops here, but not like in Sweden, and I can’t find my favorite tea “Rhubarb & Cream” in this beer-drinking country.

***Stayed pretty much out of touch with everyone & everything.

I didn’t blog, talk on the phone or even e-mail much, and I didn’t really keep up with the news either. It makes you feel strangely guilty after a while.

By Lovain

Our children talking to friends on the phone

Last night after dinner, out of the blue, the oldest one came up to me with the phone in his hand and asked “which button do I push to call Einstein (his best friend)?” Puzzled, and curious to see where this was going, I simply showed him, and told him to wait until someone answered, say his name and ask to speak to Einstein. “Hello? Hello?” he said, until someone eventually answered, whereupon he said his name and asked to speak to Einstein. I turned the speaker phone on, and could hear that our friends Mr. Speedo & the amazing M. (Einstein’s parents) were playing along, handing the phone to Einstein. The conversation went something like this:

Oldest one: “Hello Einstein.”
Einstein: “Hello oldest one.”
Oldest one: “But we went to the store and daddy bought a puzzle cheetah for me.”
Einstein: “Oh.”
Oldest one: “It’s only a small cheetah. See you in school tomorrow! Bye.”
Einstein: “Bye.”

It was not even a minute later that the phone rang. It was Einstein’s sister Pretty who wanted to talk to the youngest one. That conversation went something like this:

Youngest one: “Hello Pretty.”
Pretty: “Hello youngest one.”
Youngest one: “But we went to the market store and daddy bought a puzzle cheetah for August.”
Pretty: “I got Jules.”
Whereupon the youngest one held up the phone and excitedly told me “Mama, Pretty got Jules like ME!”
Youngest one: “OH! You got a big Jules like ME?”
Pretty: “But it’s a little Jules.”
Whereupon the youngest one held up the phone again and animatedly told me “Mama, Pretty got a LITTLE Jules!”
Pretty: “I made a bed for Jules.”
Whereupon the youngest one held up the phone again and told me “Mama, Pretty made a bed for Jules!” and I told him to ask her if she wanted to play together with their Jules, and to tell her that he was going to bed, and to say good-night.
Youngest one: “you want to play…? I’m going to bed now. Bye!”
Pretty: “Bye!”

3- and 5-year olds. We’ll never know.

By Lovain

Surviving my third pneumonia

I am finally starting to feel a little more energetic. I think what bothers me the most when I'm sick is not the pain or the fever but the inability to halt the complete destruction of the house taking place before my very watery, fever-dim eyes. When I don't have the strength to fight the advancement of Kant research material laboriously and gradually seizing control of the kitchen table, not to mention the distribution of toys around the house and other disorders stride, everything turns into a mess, and this bothers me an almost alarmingly lot. As soon as I have the strength to exceed primary functionality, I commence the expurgation.

How did it get this bad? Last week I was on the Atkins diet, happily loosing a pound a day, when I found myself coughing oysters; eventually on Monday, I went to the doctor and got a sick-note after the suspiscious diagnose "viral bronchitis". I "should feel better by Thursday" she promised. On Tuesday I had however to attend a screening day I had been scheduled for for weeks; a simple matter that turned into a day of torture (subject for another blog), and by Wednesday I felt worse, suffering from fever, worse cough and aches. The next morning I went back to the doctor and was immediately sent home with a prescribtion for penicillin and bedrest. To top this off, the oldest one came down with a fever Thursday night, further adding to the family misery. A couple of unfortunate days indeed: I am however glad to report that we all are on the mend now.

By Lovain

The youngest one's nose scab

When I got home from work the other day, I was met by the youngest one by the door, and he had a scraped-up nose. It looked awful! Covering his entire nudge, the scrape had bled and was already starting to get infected. Anxious, I picked him up and asked him what had happened. “A boy pushed me” he said, not acting too disturbed by it. “Your nose!” I said and touched it gently to asses the damage, and then I asked him if he was hurt somewhere else, checking his hands & knees. He proudly held up his hands to me and said with a broad smile on his face “look mama, I didn’t catch myself with my hands! My hands are not hurt at all! I only caught myself with my nose!” Fantastic.

By Lovain

4 will become 5: we are expecting a pet

After a week of asking, begging, pleading and entreating, I’ve given in to getting the Husband & the boys a hamster. A man at my work announced that he had baby hamsters for sale, and I released this information at home, which resulted in a week of deliberation. This week has now come to an end, and I’ve decided to stop opposing. It’s mainly the Husband who has persisted, and seeing that he is a responsible adult, I’m certain he can take care of the little animal - with the boys’ help, of course.

The Husband will purchase a cage and food today. The hamster arrives on Thursday. Now all we need is a name. The boys have been discussing “Zorro” or “Avatar”. Any other suggestions?

By Lovain

Going on a diet: Atkins, Atkins, Atkins!

When I started working a year and a half ago, I began to comfort eat. I would eat whatever was convenient; croissants for breakfast, dürums for lunch, pizza/hamburger/big servings of pasta for dinner, and then cookies and other snacks in the evenings, often accompanied by beer or soda. I’ve finally decided to turn the trend around, but it’s a lot of work to shed the extra pounds; between 30 and 40 in total.

After a couple of days of Atkins, my body is starting to protest “WHERE ARE MY CARBS?!” I almost feel like I have the flu; headaches, a little nauseous, bloated and tired. They do warn you about this, and since I’ve gone through this diet before (3 years ago - a while after a birth) I know what to expect. If I can get through these next couple of days I’ll be on the road to happiness. Last time I lost a lot of weight in very little time, but I didn’t have to walk around hungry, and after the first week you do feel great. It’s not a diet I can live with for an extended amount of time; I simply love fruit & any dish involving potatoes too much, and I’m not much of a meat & fat fan (although I love a good steak), however it’s a good way to start off a general and improved diet. If I can loose the first 20 pounds within the next month, I’ll be very, very happy.

By Lovain

In the news: twins in Brazil born a year apart

This is pretty cool: Earlier this week, in Venda Nova, Brazil, twins were born naturally, not only on different days, but different years. Marcos was born at 23:59 on the 31st of December 2006, and his brother Mateus at 00:01 on the 1st of Januari 2007.

By Lovain